The Wandering Only and the Subjunctive If

when grammar matters

As an English major, I’ve always been particularly partial to the thought of the wandering ONLY. It seems to be a free spirit much as I see myself, so if it wants to wander who am I to corral it? But of course there is a reason for the only to keep its proper place—it actually affects the meaning of a sentence in a very particular way. My only regret in this regard is that I haven’t kept track of the many instances of misplaced only’s I have encountered in my life. Notice I didn’t say it is the only regret I have had in my life, although there are very few actually, but the regret I have about this subject. I rather delighted in discovering a wandering only in my reading because the misplacement is usually quite subtle. Of course nowadays I can look up the term and discover all sorts of examples. There is a website called “Scribendi.com” which describes it succinctly, and I was glad to find out that it really is a thing. Please go to that source to learn more about this subject. I certainly don’t want to make any misappropriated quotations in this contentious age.

And now on to the subjunctive IF. This has also piqued my interest more lately because it seems to have fallen out of favor. I was taught that IF should be followed by a subjunctive verb such as, If I were a rich man, because it presupposes that you are not rich. Nowadays, it seems as though If I was has become acceptable instead. Again, you could turn to our seemingly inexhaustible supply of information online to follow my fascination with grammar if you were so inclined.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch (a phrase which some of my people recognize that I use rather too often), I finally watched the movie “One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” yesterday. Again, thanks to Netflix for giving me the ability to catch up on some culture from my generation which I missed at the time. I see now why this Jack Nicholson vehicle has stood the test of time; and I was glad to finally meet Nurse Ratched played by Louise Fletcher. And I have started reading Fancy Bear Goes Phishing by Scott J. Shapiro, subtitled The Dark History of the Information Age, In Five Extraordinary Hacks. It is the assignment for The Freedom Academy with Asha Rangappa, and I am learning about the start of the internet, which I lived through but never knew much about. In fact, my then-husband and I used to joke that we were practicing “internet avoidance” something almost impossible to do today.

But all of my ramblings this morning are an attempt to avoid thinking too much about the political maelstrom brewing. Today being January 7, reminders of the Capitol Insurrection of January 6, 2021, are everywhere. How anyone watching the footage of that event could possibly include the word peaceful in any description thereof is completely beyond my understanding. I have restacked a couple of great compilations of the news and subsequent legal cases prepared by Jim Buie and Greg Olear, so I hope you will refresh your memory about those events. And also become as knowledgeable as possible about what we are facing in this pivotal election year. I’m still watching Caddo Parish, Louisiana, hoping that Henry Whitehorn prevails as Sheriff when they hold another election. And of course, I’m troubled about women college presidents being targeted by the horribly power-mad Elise Stefanik.

My final post is to tell you what great fun I had with my returning of the cans on Thursday. Our State has increased the deposit to 10 cents a can so I was excited about that. But I honestly was gobsmacked when I finished feeding the machines and collected all my slips to turn in and the teller handed me $40.50. So it took me an hour to do the five bags of cans but I got to chat with other can people and I didn’t end up with tennis elbow. A good outcome all around!